♥ june . 2018 : i killed my beloved ♥
Its dark, evening, night. I walk through the streets of Paris, downtown somewhere.
Narrow, moist streets, it rained earlier. Im in a sort of rush, im uneasy.
I hide in my black cape and black hat. Head between my shoulders. Rush to my favorite bar.
I am in an alley now, its all rotten, dirt, anger, danger, darkness, whores and scum.
My eyes are everywhere: left, right, left, right, left, right… and ahead.
Yes, there she is. That piece of betrayal, delusion, luring me into.. what?
She’s standing in a portal, in front of a house, a door.
People passing by, also in a rush, no one looks at any one! All scum with secrets!
Hiding in their capes and hats, so called gentlemen puh!
Yeah, that woman! That whore who thinks she is the world!
Standing there, so full of herself.
Im 2 steps away now, i grab my knife.
No one is watching! All busy with their own mischief.
I take 2 steps, into the portal, and stab her in her belly, one time.
No one reacts or notices it.
Anyway, its just a woman, some stupid whore.
I feel relieved, my rush is gone and i feel great!
I walk some streets till i reach my bar.
Yeah, theres my table, at the end of the bar.
And some mates, how nice!
I wanna drink beer now, i feel so good.
Coz im a man, and im in charge!
I sit at my table with some guys and i get drunk.
And im bragging about how i killed that whore.
Ain’t i great guys!
Well, they aren’t really friends i guess, coz they catch me.
And they get me to jail.
And they bring me to the guillotine.
And i feel the blade slicing my neck, but its not sharp enough.
My head is still attached to my body, with still a piece of flesh connected to the body.
Fuck, even this i screw up!
I slowly fade into red, then black, then nothing…..
After decapitation, i came in a black black world and i sank in redness.